At the outset, let me state that this is not a narration of my exploits in some Himalayan Car Rally or a cross country adventure in deep deserts and high mountains which require a skilled Navigator to complement the driver. I have done nothing of that kind, in my life, having been involved in only mundane activities, unless mandated by my employer. Despite this, I have landed in some hilarious situations, if not edge of the seat thriller, well almost like that. A few of such experiences happened courtesy the ubiquitous Global Positioning System ( GPS), without which nobody takes out a car on the roads these days and which has necessitated human Navigators in daily lives.
A few years back, we decided to beat the summers by taking a family holiday in the popular getaway, Kasauli. On the designated day, the car took to the highway with yours truly on the wheel and the son embellishing the rear row seat.
After an uneventful journey of five hours, mostly through national highways, we finally had the Navigator getting busy as we veered off the highway, towards the Kasauli hills. It was also close to lunch time and the son had already flagged the hunger pangs. The car was on a narrow, winding road, largely deserted, with deep valleys on the port side and steep hills on the other side, while I was trying to find the way to the Resort where we were booked. I could sense that the Resort was somewhere in the vicinity, down the road and sought assistance from the Navigator. After, a few minutes, the Navigator cheerfully asked me to turn Left; I braked to a halt but the 15 feet wide road had no left turn, fore or aft, only valleys. I then looked Right, giving the Navigator the benefit of doubt of having confused between the two limbs but no success here also. The curvy road had no exits as yet in any cardinal direction in the foreseeable distance. So, I enquired from the Navigator who by now had turned indignant; “Pl do as Google says and turn Left or I will stop navigating”, I was threatened in no uncertain terms. Not an unfamiliar refrain to my ears on the roads of NCR but then these were dicey hill roads. So here was an unprecedented situation in this Hamlet……”To Be or Not to Be”. If I turned the wheels left, minimum plunge of 200 feet was inevitable. If I defied the diktat, my plunge for the next 200 days was a given. I racked up my memory which reconfirmed to me that we had never made a suicide pact.
Not wanting to indulge in any such illegal activity, I had to find a solution fast. Besides, it won’t be fun either, there being no electronic media camera crews or social media whiz kids present to transmit the suicidal event live. The genius in me then came to the fore………, yes, we will follow the Google as you wish, I announced to the Navigator. The responsibility of communicating with the Google was then shifted to the son in the rear seat. Lo and behold, we reached the Resort in a few minutes with the Lunch service of their Restaurant still available.
The incident left me ruminating in the evening; lesson had to be absorbed quickly or else I will be condemned to repeat the scene the next day. Wisdom dawned and next day I surrendered the wheel to the son, who was only too pleased to oblige. The day had been planned as an excursion to the famous Chail palace and hills. I silently patted myself for this masterstroke which also enabled me to retire to the rear seat with an opportunity for an unencumbered and unfettered view of the mesmerizing scenic beauty. The journey began well and the car went past Solan and turned away from the Shimla highway towards Chail. I was enjoying the peace for a change and the tranquility induced by lush greenery all around had me in a state of trance.
However, I could still sense that the climb towards the Chail hill had been interrupted after we went past a Y junction. I decided to focus on my new found freedom and largesse of the Mother Nature. For another half an hour, the car continued to descend and I was wondering whether the destination had been changed from Chail to Pakistan but I was in “Sannu Ki” mode !!. Besides, discretion is the better part of valour. Finally, it was the turn of the son to become uncomfortable. He dispossessed the Navigator of the Gizmo and after quick realization, exchanged a few angry words while making a U Turn. We reached Chail Palace more than an hour behind planned schedule with the Navigator in “full sulk mode”, something I have always wanted to avoid.
To cut short the story of the next four hours and return journey to the Kasauli resort; the many inviting eating joints and Dhabas on the Shimla highway failed to force our car to a halt, despite my feeble protests. This time, even the hunger pangs had to beat a hasty retreat and I resigned myself to our collective fate. I finally had a piece of Pizza in the evening after returning to Kasauli, thank God for small mercies.
This brings me to pose a challenge to Dear GPS…. We love you but can you please become “Navigator Proof” ?!!
Tailpiece, By Surjit
Navigators will take some more time to guide us in unfamiliar regions of India. The good old ‘local help’ is more dependable. For myself, I have chosen a simpler option. Acquire a cheap car, and hire a good local driver with the money saved on the vehicle. The little money you spend on the chauffer will buy you an incredible amount of peace of mind. Remember, Arjuna sought the help of Lord Krishna, to be his ‘parthasarathi’!
